Verse 13- "To answer before listening—
that is folly and shame."
This verse reminds us that we need to really listen to people. So many people are ready to talk or state their opinion without really listening. I think we should be grounded in our beliefs, and our answers should be from a foundation of Scripture. Listening may not change what you say. Listening may, however, change how you say it. Sometimes when we don't listen, we answer questions that haven't even been asked, and we leave unanswered the question before us. We miss opportunities to speak to someone's heart because we were too considered with our answer to truly hear their problem.
When we listen we know where the person we are talking to is coming from. We begin to know if the issue at hand is a "head issue" or a "heart issue". Head issues can be with an answer of facts. Very straightforward and as simple possible. Heart issues require facts with a level of loving care. It may not shape what you say, but it may change our tone and compassion for how we say it. When I listen to someone, I can start to understand where they are at and work to teach them how to get where they need to be. In fact, if I listen carefully my next words may not be a statement at all. It may be a question. Jesus was the expert at this. How often did he respond to someone not with a direct answer, but with a question? Following up a question with a question can help someone lead themselves to the right answers or question why they think the way they do in the first place.